If you are tired of being on an emotional roller-coaster, and are fed up with people and situations that are constantly punching your buttons, you have the power to re-program your reactions. To do this, you must become more aware of your feelings than you may ever have been. That's good. It will lead to a better understanding of what makes you tick.
1. Carry a small notebook with you at all times. One that is small enough to fit comfortably in your pocket or purse. Never be without it.
2. When you fly off the handle, or have an unreasonable reaction to something, STOP. Excuse yourself. Get to a quiet place quickly. A bathroom is better than nothing.
3. In your notebook, write down exactly what just happened; the incident that set you off and your reaction to it. That's all. Just write it down.
4. When you get home, go to a quiet place where you can be alone, and read over the events of the day. Allow your mind to wander. Examine the sights, smells, sounds - everything that comes up from your memory banks. Keep going back in your memory, and try to identify what this was TRULY all about. You may need to do this several times in the beginning but, with practice, you're going to get very good at this.
5. Write on paper, or talk into a recorder, those things which are beginning to surface that are connected to the earlier incident. Examine them; analyze them; dissect them; tear them apart. If there was anything happy or pleasant in the memory, mentally take those things out and put them in a filing folder marked "Happy Triggers". Take what's left, and see if there is anything more that you can turn into a positive force. If so, take those things out and put them in your new "Happy Triggers" file.
6. Visualize yourself taking the negative elements which have been left behind from this memory, setting them on fire, and watching the smoke rise to the Universe where it will be transformed into a positive force. Then visualize yourself removing that entire Hot Button file folder out of the filing cabinet and adding it to the fire. Replace it with the Happy Triggers file you just made.
7. If the same incident should come up in the future, catch yourself. Smile and say, "Oh, no. That's now a trigger file. No more Hot Buttons here."
This may sound very elementary and childish. It is. These situations were built in childhood, and it is that child who is reacting in an unreasonable and illogical manner that is totally out of keeping with the reality of the situation. It is the child that must be re-educated and reassured. You see, our subconscious mind has created a space for the circumstances that are responsible for such a negative reaction. If we don't replace that negative with a positive, it will merely rebuild the old file with new experiences. If we put a new and happy file in the space occupied by the old, there will be nothing left that can be identified as a storage space for anything new that may come along. It will merely be a passing incident; one of life's experiences.
You can do this. The rewards are a more peaceful life, and a greater understanding of yourself.
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